missing you…
Well, this would be my son. Derrick Alejandro Rivera. He is now two years old, almost going to add another half to that age. I miss him dearly.
Being a father is something out of this world, especially when you want to do so much more, but so far away. Sometimes people do not want to listen, some people do not want to understand.
Why? Is the question always floating around my mind. Why is it that I cannot do more when I am trying so hard. Why cannot I see him more often.
I would understand if I was one of those fathers that left out and never wanted to return, or show up years later. On the contrary, I am not. I am a father that embraced my son with open arms and wanted to do so much for him, that was either not done for me, or well what can I say…. I wanted to be a father. Give your children the best that you can, and more that you have never had.
There are so much more feelings within that I want to release. Things did not go well between my ex-wife and I, and still at times, yes, I dont think it is going to go well any time soon. I try my best to keep things calm, just to hear my son’s voice. Talk to him, and it kills me inside. I cry, and cry often. I find myself staring at his pictures, while he is passing me by, growing up so fast, and I am no where near.
I wanted him for Thanksgiving, I just want to spend time with him…. period.
So papo, Daddy misses you. Some day, I dont know when, some day soon, I will be there, at least to visit. Daddy loves you……
